Showery thoughts

I am alone. I have created this world I live in. I have created everything: sands, trees, seas and oceans,  mountains, birds, flies. I have created galaxies. Universes.  I wander alone. I have wandered and traveled across those universes. Creating and constructing new worlds, destroying and smashing others. I have wondered for years, centuries even. Time seems limitless and hence I immortal. I have all the time in the world. I own time. I control time and I can travel through it. Back and forth, instantaneously. I am time. I live alone,  because I chose to. I have created companions, friends, soul mates. People. I demanded nothing and yet they wanted  everything for themselves. They wanted power and fame, and power and fame I gave them. But it was not enough. And sooner or later, the man will kill his brother and bury him like a crow, and the son will be killed by his people, or will disobey his father's wishes and orders. History repeats itself, even with...

It was a long November night, at school, I was supposed to be working on my Master’s thesis proposal that I was supposed to hand it in a couple of days -and for those who do not know me, I am procrastinator and I love it. At that point I have been wasting a lot of time, precious time, time that I am actually in need of. It was just then when I got fed up of all the temptations around me, all of them: TV series, social networks, movies, music, and internet surfing, literally everything. I just then closed my eyes and covered my ears with my hands, wishing if all these temptations would not exist anymore, screaming from inside out: No more!!! The idea of this photo then struck my mind, I quickly ran to the blackboard, drew it, and a friend took the photo.

“ At the end of the day, we only have our imaginations. I love to imagine and fantasize about everything, possible it is or impossible, for imagination has no limits or boundaries. I will always imagine, as if not; I will seize to exist as who I am. As for I am my own novel, writer and protagonist. ” M.Osman

In the darkest hours of the human’s insanity I enslaved you to be mine for the whole eternity  - All I wish for is your mind and soul, To rule the world and your kingdom to ruin and fall  - I am your darkest fear; I am your blackest deeds, I am your sins. The evil who feeds from your needs.  - Come my son, I’ll show you the way to redemption  - I made you fall from his grace, And then, I pursued you down Mud you are and what will you become, For good until there is no more sun.  - I am your usher; I am your guide, And in your toughest times I will be by your side.  - Remember destruction it is not a fairy-tale, Remember the earth while away you sail.  - written in the 1st of January 2011 by: Mohamed Maged Osman.

“ one day I shall defy the perceived rules that concur our minds and control our thoughts ” M.Osman 3rd May 2013

Can you imagine if there was other alternative universes, one of your other alternatives can be watching you-just right now, yelling at you to go back to work/school or whatever you have to do while your current version here is just chilling: eating bacon stripes or popcorn while watching your favorite TV show

When grudge and revenge blind us from the greater good, then and only then we should all be punished for not being able to coexist by falling into a dark abyss where working together is the only exodus while our juniors watch and learn

وجدتني ونفسي تحدثني هائماً في صحراء من العدم تجادلني، تباحثني، تعاقبني و أنا صاغ، و لا زالت تزايد في الكرم  فوقفت أمام حشود أفكاري احاضرني فتسابق الزمن مع شبابي إلى الهرم فضحت الوساوس التي تلاعبني و صحوت من سكرة الأحلام و حاربت القيود التي تكبلني و تذكرت أن بلعمل تبنى أمجاد إلامم  Molde, Norway.  3rd of May 2013

مصر. أنها تلك الكلمة البسيطة، التي بنطقها تتحرك مشاعر كثيرة بداخلك. ذكريات فياضة تتهافت أمام عينيك. أفكار شتى تطاير داخل سماء عقلك الشاسع. مصر. هي أول محبوبة لقلبك. مصر. هي البيت و السكن التي يؤل إليها وجدانك. قد يكون كلامي ليس بالشأن العظيم لبعضكم، ولكن لكل من هاجر، أو يدرس أو يعمل بعيداً عنها، أو كل من هجرها طوعاً أو حتى كرهٍ، تأتيه تلك أوقات ظلمة حين يشتاق إلى حرها و شمسها، لفقرها و غناها، لديماغوجيتها و علمانيتها، لتطرفها و إعتدال تفكرها، لعشوائيتها و فوضويتها لنظامها وتنظيمها، لشبابها و للتجاعيد في أوجه اجدادها. مصر

I am suffocating or having a heart attack, I don’t know, I am no expert, yet I feel like I am dying, that is what I am sure about. I just returned home after along working day. A long work day and a marathon of chain smoking, I mark the opening of the fourth pack, while I smelled the freshly brewed third patch of coffee. I just returned home, when I felt my left side aching, aching so terribly, I could feel my heart pump so quickly and so strong. I felt getting warmer and warmer, or is it the surrounding atmosphere? I cannot focus properly. I tried to walk to the nearest window for fresh air. I tried to open it but in vain. It was so difficult.  I tried to breath, but it was becoming impossible. I was very hot, unbearably hot, sweating as well. I was just standing near the window, helplessly struggling, trying to buy more time.Buy more time? For what? To spend it aimlessly? Would I change the course of my life if I am destined to live? I do not think so; I think I will r...

I am trapped in my own mind. I can’t escape; I am confined in my own body, lying down in the floor. It’s like living as the miserable creature/man in Metallica’s “One” official video. I can feel some one is hovering around. I can hear him sometimes muttering with words I can’t realize and understand.Sometimes I can clearly hear him, speaking about life, death and aftermath.Mostly he speaks about why he is here. Lucky him he is free to move in his own space-time continuum, I can’t. I am confined in my own corpse, in my own dimension. Yet poor him; he is driving himself crazy with his many questions:why I am stuck here? Why am I dead? Am I actually dead? Many and many whys and yet not even a single hint. You can hear his voice clearly feel the deep pain,deep misery, ache and agony. In an essence he is just like me: A living reflection of myself. “Darkness,my friend, where are thee? Darkness, my old friend, what have I become? Show me the way, guide me. I am blind without you here. I...

I was dead. I was standing in the middle of my room. My room; a normal bachelor room: old food on the table near the bed where the blanket lies on the corner, what appears as a chair; clearly mounted by a pyramid of cloths. The desk is next to me, that’s where my laptop, tens of unfinished coffee cups-which at some point I use them as an ashtray too. The laptop is always open, mainly on desktop; you can see one of Max Payne’s comic strips as a background. In this background you can see Max Payne falling, while he is saying “No matter how long you spend climbing up. You can still fall back down in an instant”. I was standing in the middle of the room, staring at my dead body lying on the floor. I was lying dead in agony and misery. You can see the gestures of misery and agony crafted on my face. Agony because I was mad to die at such a young age. At that age you are full of energy, dreams and hope. When you feel that you have the potential to change the world, you start to try, a...

So I decided I cannot miss that amazing scenery. I arrived home, changed my clothes, got my camera, and started to walk. It takes around five minutes to go there. I arrived and was struck by the amazing scenery, it captured my heart, my brain was trying fathom and comprehend the details this beautifulness.   I took out my camera, set the mode to make the shutter open for fifteen seconds in order to absorb and collect much light, took couple of pictures. The weather was rather cold, almost zero degrees, so whilst taking the picture and trying to fix the right position of the camera and the tripod, I was experiencing a slight pain in my fingers as they were simply freezing.  I then wandered around to relocate and get another view of this wonderful scene. So, I started moving, got myself in a dark forest-like road, it was not long, yet it was long enough not to see its end. I was wearing my contact lenses, which in fact was not very helpful because other than being short s...

I was walking home from the city center, around ten pm. It was a cold -yet warm if compared by last year's weather-lonely night, snow was melting away; probably making room for the new fresh snow that is yet to come. Streets were empty, it is always empty at that hour, while in general the city was empty as it was a holiday time and everyone have found some place to go to in the south of the continent. As I was walking, I have noticed the full moon. It was in its eternal perfect round shape. While the moon was strongly visible, clouds were fighting to swipe it and hide it from the sky, an indefinite battle. The unorthodox moon’s silverish light casted upon the Moldefjord in a magical, yet indeed a perfect scene that no human can duplicate. The mountains were dark, as if the moon chose not to give away its blessings to the magnificent mountains, jealousy? Maybe. Baffled was I, that I could not take my eyes off this amazing nature. That for a moment, I remembered how whe...

لا اعلم لماذا نفكر واحنا تحت الدش, وعندما اقول أفكر, فأنه عادة تفكر في اشياء أخرى على غير العادة, قد نفكر فالسياسة أو الإقتصاد أو حتى قد نتذكر تلك الجملة التي قالها لك زميلك فالعمل, أو قد تصل إلى فكرة أو نظرة متعلقة بحياتك البائسة أسمع البعض يتذمر و البعض ينطق بشكوا تجاه كلمة "بائسة" نعم بائسة و الدليل: ما صلة قارابتك مثلا بـبيل جاتس؟  بلاش, كام كتاب قراءة في حياتك وما هي نسبة هذا الكتب إلى مجموع الكتب الهامة التي يجب قراتها؟ ما هو ترتيب دولتك بالنسبة لمؤشر التنمية البشرية؟ نعم بائسة سيدي القارئ. قد يكون تأثير تلك الافكار الهادفة هو المية السخنة و  المزيكا الرومانسية التي تسمعها و انت تتلذذ بالمية تحت الدش, تلك الحميمية و .... : اعتقد الان بعضكم كان يصيح قائلا: يا عم إنت:  " too much information" (في حين البعض قد يقول: خلص بـ.... (ناسف لتلك الشتيمة, هارجعلو لما اشوفو ده) و هناك البعض منكم الذي تمكنت منه ابتسامة شهوانية عريضة عندما قرا "حميمية" و ده اقوله "الي بتطلبه ده عيب وحرام" أما آخرون فهم الذين ينتظرون قراءة الب...

. لو الاخوان بيحبوا مصر, كانوا حولوا يتوصلوا مع الجيش والشعب و المعارضة بشكل دمقراطي بدل الحرب الأهلية البيجروا مصر ليها. 2. مرسي فشل فأدارة البلاد نظرا لعدم وجود مؤهلات سيساية و اقتصادية. فشل ايضا فإنه يكسب الشعب فصفه, الشعب كله و ليس فصيل معيَّن. 3. الإخوان فشلوا في كسب حب الشعب, خاصة بعد الوعود و الأماني التي كانوا يطعموها لنا. 4. مرسي و جماعته اعتقد انهم يستندوا إلى مبدأ مهم الا و هو الشرعية, ببساطة احنا الجبناه يحكم, احنا الشعب سواء اخوان أو العصروا على نفسهم لامونا, ليست مشكلة الاخوان إن الشعب مش منظم زيهم و إنه بدل مايركز صوته على شخص واحد تفتتت الأصوات على اكتر من مرشح. مبدأ الشرعية مهم عشان بعد كده أي رئيس هايحكم هيبقى طرطور للجيش (مع كامل احترامي لجيش مصر العظيم, ربنا يحفظه لنصرة الحق) 5. بس مبدأ الشرعية برده لا يعطي الحق لتشجيع حرب أهلية من اجل نصرة جماعة أو شرعية, لأن من الواضح إن 33 مليون النزلوا (اغلبية) ضد مرسي رافضين لفشله (بغض النظر سواء بقى عملاء أو ممولين أو ده خطة لهدف أو لاخر) و بالتالي كان في حد لازم يتدخل الا و هو الجيش. 6. اعتقد الجيش كان ممكن ...